Morality and Non-Monogamy

Morality is: a personal or social set of standards for good or bad behavior and character, or the quality of being right and honest (Cambridge English Dictionary)

When I first was first introduced to the idea of non-monogamy, nearly a decade ago, it really shook my moral code. I spent a lot of time soul searching, reading, and absorbing every item that mentioned non-monogamy. It took a lot of hard work, but I ultimately reached the conclusion that I was still the ethical and moral member of society that I was in my previous monogamous relationship. I rationalized that my sex life was no one’s business, and as I didn’t judge anyone else’s sexual choices, I felt safe and comfortable making my own adult choices. But, as many of you reading this article know, we do not live in a bubble, and making a personal decision does not always extend beyond that.

While I came to peace with my sex life, and my relationship desires, something that I wasn’t fully prepared for was the questioning of my choices from those who cared about me. No matter how hard I tried to live in an ethical and moral way, a friend, co-worker, or family member would always have a question that threw me for a loop. One in particular sticks out in my mind. My mother asked me, on more than one occasion, what I would do when I had kids? Because, she went on, you just cannot raise children in a non-monogamous…