Non-Monogamy as a Stepping Stone to Love

Hold Onto Your Judgment…

Krys Ghislaine
7 min readMay 28, 2024
Seaside Sunset (Photo by KGB)

I lived a non-monogamous existence for a decade. And in that time, I attempted pretty much every type of relationship dynamic I could think of in my quest of exploring love. The majority of the time, I would have told you that I was deeply in love with my partner and that we were so lucky in that we had each other and the ability to have all of our extra needs met. I have written many blog posts that echo the same sentiment, non-monogamy allowed us to have it all! What I didn’t realize was, that when I found the right person, there was simply no need for non-monogamy. Now now, before all you non-monogamous folks get up in arms, I would like the chance to explain what I mean in full.

Monogamous Origins

When I was in my first long term relationship, I had only ever been with one man. And at about year 3 or 4, I started getting a little restless. I knew that the two of us could make it work, if we really really wanted to, and if we sacrificed everything to stay together. But, I also knew, that I was curious about what else was out there. I was curious about other men, curious about women, and I was even growing a curiosity about domination, and different sexual dynamics that existed. We began to incorporate role playing, as a way to explore these sexual queries of mine, but…